I Banish You!

On a sartorial site, which I frequent, called Dappered I was banned for a comment that, I think, was a bit too confrontational for the site's owner.

It was on this article.  Before I pressed "submit" I re-read the combox guidelines:

"Because accepting college or high school as your peak is pathetic."

 - Joe, from dappered.com

Joe, people like are what I like to call douchebags, cowards and pussies. Yea, I know you lift but you're still all said things.

I knew what I was about to submit wasn't the type the owner was accustomed in dealing with, but I took the "Write only what you'd say to a person's face," seriously because I would have said what I wrote if he, the site owner - Joe, said what he wrote with the tone he wrote it in. I guess Joe didn't really appreciate my candor. After all, he is the site owner - the man - the boss - the umpire - god - so he automatically has the upper hand, having the last word. If he responded back I know that others would've backed him up.

I understand the the gist of what he was saying, but I disagreed with it (now I'm not sure what "alternative" I could have proposed since it wasn't about articles of clothing, shoes or watches). I basically said that he sounded bitter and, from my experience, that many who did fit the "bro" archetype or the ones that seemed to really like college are doing okay career wise. (My comment was deleted so I have no proof of what I exactly type up.)

But I'm a bit perplexed because the archetype of the "too dumb to even cook eggs and never amounted to anything" is the high school football star (see Uncle Rico from Napoleon Dynamite), not this guy:

                                 

Before it was "You'll get 'em in college" to the nerds in high school. Now it's "you'll get 'em after college" to people like Joe. What's next, "You'll get 'em in retirement"? It seems the Joes of the world got tired of "You'll get 'em in college" and needed another scapegoat to tell the world "Suckers! I showed you!" Enter "College. Meh."

It has evolved from "You'll be working for me," to "You'll be an office drone while I'm not." From being a superior to another, it's being your own superior. In other words: I am my own god.

As for the "bros", one "bro" (probably the  most stereotypical "bro" I know who was also President of his fraternity, and was also my high school's valedictorian) was a medical student at Case Western and is now interning; another was hired by PWC; two entered law school -- one at Case Western and one at Florida; one decided to be involved in the Greek Life administration so he enrolled in Florida State for his masters; a "bro" I was in in high school band with attended Illinois for law. There have been other career success stories from my own fraternity -- alumni achieving impressive things in their chosen career path.

If I take into yearly salaries as "winning" then I bet, once the budding lawyers finish school & are hired by a firm, all those I mentioned above will be earning much more than Joe when he reaches his mid 30s. Or I could take into intellectual rigor. But I won't, at least when it comes to yearly salary, when measuring "success" because I don't see salary as a sound way of gauging "You showed 'em!"

I don't know what Joe's, or the those that favored the article, experiences were in college (honestly, this all sounds like people complaining about high school, but it's not ... It's about college) but I have a feeling he's the one constantly comparing himself to those who may be more sartorial than he is; he just seems the type to look up to/admire "cool guys" that managed to rake in uber amounts of money in very niche (cool) fields, like fashion or the movie industry. Some of his posts - that aren't necessarily related to fashion - just come across trying way too hard to be "casual cool."

Others who did enjoy their college years (I think they did), but weren't involved in the Greek system, seem to be doing okay as well. All are gainfully employed - one's an accountant; one works as an engineering consultant; a couple as music teachers; my own sibling is a financial consultant and many were recently married. One has two kids already and she's in her late twenties; she decided to become a homemaker even though she's a college graduate. Some of these people went to schools that are known for massive school spirit such as Notre Dame. The accountant attended NIU, which is known as a party school. I'd be surprised if she said "meh" when asked about her uni years; she seemed to like the party culture & the school itself. They were all career oriented.

I have heard the "best years of your life" in reference to college, which I thought was a bit shallow, but I took it as "this four short years, make the most of it, and don't screw up." Don't screw up. Yea, the pressure is on. Many of my peers- okay, upon thinking about it, almost all - that attended college looked at it as a major step to having a livelihood. It was seen as the gateway to the working world that their parents didn't have (most of the kids I went to grade school and high school with came from blue collar working families whose parents didn't hold college degrees). 

Now, compare this to Joe. It's just too perfect of a situation; he just falls into the hands of my past posts. It's comical, really.

The owner, Joe, worked a 9-5 job, quit and opened his own site known as Dappered (as linked above). I read an interview of Joe and his tone was the usual "I'm my own boss" self-masturbation. Good for you, Joe, really. But not good for you because, when confronted about questionable opinion pieces, you have demonstrated that you are not open to (generally constructive) criticism. You either ban or let your lap dogs finish the job.

Maybe that's why so many of these "ditch the white collar job and open your own blog and/or youtube channel" seem like insecure bitches on a personal level with egos at least a foot taller than their actual height. It's not that they were too good for the "white collar job", it's just that the job wasn't paying them enough attention to their own (perceived) specialness.  

Late last year, around the last quarter, I was at my godmother's place. My mother and her were talking about jobs; they said "A job is a job (in reference to doing a job that isn't your 'dream' job)" and that one should be thankful for it, after all, one could be unemployed or working as a prostitute (my words, not theirs). Hockey player Andrew Shaw wears a black bracelet dedicated to the iron workers, some are his childhood friends, of the Canadian town he grew up in.

If the new frontier for modernism is smugness filled with contempt for all the "office drones" and "normal jobs", and one pats himself on the back because "he escaped", then what a lousy new frontier.

"That's it?!" I'd say.

It's not like such people escaped from a concentration camp (but bet your bottom dollar they'd make their story into something grand). 

It's still domesticated in a way, if you aren't a travel blogger, since fashion/fitness/beauty bloggers work at home. It's ironic.

"Doing what you love" (as your main job) is insanely overrated. I suppose this is what modernism has wrought, but "doing what you love" is just the start of this self-entitled mentality that is so pervasive and potent amongst those under 35.

UPDATE (4/13/15): Since the site owner of dappered.com re-posted his "It Gets Better" piece  (he re-posts
articles that he thinks have 'good' insights) I can't help but compare it to the actual "It Gets Better" campaign that was directed at the LGBT community but then later added anti-bullying as a way to kinda-not-really save face when confronted about "How about all the kids are bullied that don't fall under the LGBT alphabet soup?" In the modernists mind they want to show up the perceived injustice they have face - directly or indirectly - they want revenge. If it ain't high school then it's college. But wait, college is like high school to them so they turn to life after college -- but guess what, they usually make a living in niche industries like entertainment or fashion with other equally insecure and indignant people. It's like, wait for it, high school!