Person A: "If I found out my current significant other had sex with her past boyfriend on the roof of her elementary school I'd be upset."
Person B: "Look, you don't own her. She had a life before she met you, as with literally every person who's in a relationship right now. The world doesn't revolve around you."
Person C: "Yea. Why would you be upset about this? Are you like in middle school?"
Probably my favorite so far, from what I've read on youtube -
I need a drink right now.
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