Religion, secularism & marriage

I've observed that many of my friends that majored in physics tend to quote Carl Sagan. I've also observed that many that I throughout high school, given their particular personality and physical makeup (a bit dorkish and tall and lanky) are non-believers.

Another thing that's worth noting is that my brother's group of friends whose only a few years older than I treat religion with a bit more respect than those who, say, are a year or two younger than me. It's not all a huge age difference, but the contrast is a little striking. From getting married in a courthouse (why anyone would do this is beyond me, well, besides them being non-religious and/or can't afford the church fees) to nature weddings (ceremonies outside that are nowhere near a church) or the marriage conducted by a non-religious officiate (I just recently learned a friend is an officiate - as I saw a picture of him presiding a marriage).

Now the first and third -- why even bother attending. It's really just a bunch of 20/30 somethings playing dress-up like Halloween, but instead of getting candy it's putting rings on each others ring finger and declaring "For life!" Instead of a ring pop, Joe and Jane, now holding jobs/careers that afford them to rent out the facilities exchange relatively expensive rings. Instead of dressing up in a werewolf costume the groom dresses in a tux and the Pink Power Ranger puts on heels and a white dress. There is no real meaning to it. If you can get a divorce in a snap (no-fault divorce) and hold up that state wedding license with smiles why the celebration? Maybe it's a failure of their upbringing. Maybe it's a failure of their lack of understanding of what marriage is as a whole, not what marriage is to the individuals getting married.

I was just at a ceremony that was held at a botanical garden and the officiate, as I learned later, is a homosexual. I knew something was "off" because during the officiates speech about the two people getting married, there was no mention of faith, God or anything transcendental besides love and commitment. The only things that were repeated was love and commitment; the speech sounded like an atheist omitting the "under God" when saying the Pledge of Alliance. Alongside the bride's brother reciting a poem about, you guessed, love. It was somewhat weird. And the entire ceremony lasted no more than 15 minutes.

There's something lacking in courthouse/secular/outdoor-weddings. These weddings really are just a proclamation of "We really, really like each other! We've decided on forever!" Okay, where's the priest? Where's the steeple? There are non. I'll skip the ceremony and show up to the reception. At least they have alcohol to make my brain accommodate the nothingness that pervades the room.

If non-religious ceremonies are this uneventful, completely void of being transcendental and bizarre between two people of the opposite sex, then I can only imagine what a ceremony would be like between two people of the same sex.

These are a few quotes that showed up on my friends facebook page. Two, I presume are atheists and the other agnostic at best.

"time will pass, nothing will last" 

"God is an alien" (when listing his religious views) 

"The Cosmos is all that is, or ever was, or ever will be." - Carl Sagan (this was one of three quotes on a three tier wedding cake)

EDIT: I just learned that one of college acquaintances, she and her boyfriend, just went to the courthouse and signed the marriage license. This was on facebook. The two dressed in casual clothes - like they were running errands - and the caption read something like this, "Well consider this my proclamation. I'm off the market! We've decided to not have a ceremony and felt it was time to finally time to sign a piece of paper." Finally time to sign a piece of paper. Why even offer a congrats in that? (Granted there were many by in-laws, immediate family members and close friends.) Why "make it official" with that line of thought? 

In contrast, another college acquaintance of mine was married at, I think, in a Catholic church. The pictures of the groomsmen and women were really lovely. The pictures of the family and the married couple in front of the alter were more lovely. I am not sure if it means anything, but if she felt the need to list "Catholic" under religious views on facebook then I suppose that there is some sort of spiritual fire in her. I am not sure about  her husband. At least their effort to respect the institution of marriage is more hopeful than the story just above.